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Fancy Footwork

Now that the World Cup is over, the majority of us Americans can stop pretending we’ve ever watched soccer before and focus on the fact that Crocs just made a high-heeled clog. Not a reasonable wedge. Not a slight platform lift. A spongy, beige and hot pink — pardon us, “platinum and wild orchid” — stiletto-inspired boat shoe.

The shoes were originally $55, but inexplicably high demand for the heeled rubber foot couches raised the going rate to $224.75 on Amazon.

The lesson here, if there is one, is that we must never assume our dreams are too hideous for public consumption. So, go forth and make something so confusing people can’t tell if it’s good or not. We believe in you.

The News

Some of us spend our free time stalking our exes on Instagram, others enter social impact challenges to improve the lives of one billion people by 2020. Tomayto, tomahto. German technology giant SAP hosted a company-wide, Shark Tank–esque challenge, “One Billion Lives,” to inspire socially-conscious tech startup ideas. Though the winners — who came up with a geospacial app, Rapid Disaster Response — were based in Toronto, local techies can find jobs with SAP at its North American HQ in Newtown Square, Pa. That is, if you aren’t lost in the rabbit hole of “the gram’s” explore page. Again, no judgement.

Remember the good old days when all you had to worry about was running off the school bus to get to the Nintendo controller before your siblings? And then you’d fight over it and someone would get hit in the face, and you’d both cry and get sent to your rooms? Ah, simpler times. Well, Old City game shop, Flyclops, is keeping the fun alive with its hit mobile game Domino!, and looking for someone to join the team. Apply for the job of your childhood dreams here, and then rub it in your older brother’s face.

Neat freaks, this one’s for you. Inspire — the Netflix of clean energy — is calling on young, ambitious wind power enthusiasts looking to get ahead in the cleantech sector to apply for its mentorship program. Get the deets on Inspire’s Do The Bright Thing movement and apply for the “Cleantech Connect Project” here.

The Jobs

Leaders of the pack, get your director-level gigs here:

  • Enigma Technologies — an enterprise technology company — is hiring a Director of Data Acquisition & Strategy to establish the first expansion office outside its home base in NYC. You must also identify, ingest and cleanse data, so, um, don’t eat a big lunch beforehand?
  • Obviously Dwight Schrute is happy as the manager at Dunder Mifflin, because this amazing opportunity to be Director of Alliances, reporting directly to the CEO at Stitch Inc., has his name all over it. Does it have yours?
  • Practice (an Instructure company) is looking for a Director of Sales to lead a robust sales pipeline of its edtech software that teaches people cool skills. Like tying knots. And how to argue really well.

Front-end devs, you’ve got some options, friends:

  • Alex’s Lemonade Stand Foundation is hiring a Front-End Developer, Childhood Cancer Data Lab to develop web interfaces for the researchers studying childhood cancer. But first, meet the brave little nugget who started it all, Alex (kleenex recommended).
  • Become a part of the smart energy team of “Avengers” at Inspire as a Front-End Engineer. Before you get your hopes up, no, Thor isn’t there. We already asked.
  • Support the interactive team at mission-based design studio Pixel Parlor as its Front-End WordPress Developer in Fishtown.

The Rest

If you haven’t found what floats your boat yet, be sure to stay up-to-date on daily job openings here. On that note, although Crocs most definitely float, we very much hope you find a pair of sensible job hunting shoes that don’t make you look like a Smurf.

See you next week. And don’t forget to share this newsletter with friends (here's the link). Even if only for the Croc news. People deserve to know.

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